From the forthcoming Blog

Spice Oddessy: Exploring the burning tounges of Saturn.

There are four stages, if you will, in the Spice Oddessy. These four stages represent haow many Scoville Units will either send a person to the Spice Moon and beyond or will have them burning up upon re-entry.

1. Spice Camper: Unflinching in their resolve to never leave the safe gravity of ultra-mildom. Should a fleck of of Cayanne pass the frontier that are their mouthes it could set off a wild fire that can only be quenched by loud complaining and derision of those who put forth this ungodly heat.

2. Spice Cadet: Ever the adventurer in their own minds. Spice Cadets although ill-equipped to handle the rigors of Spice Travel they will venture with you to the moons of Thai-Food. You'll make certain to ask for robo-mild curry, but it most certainly will still be beyond thier levels of Spicy-G Force tolerance but god how they try. They will seldom leave orbit and will always attempt to find a spice helmet that fits. The SPice Cadets spirit is to be commended.

3. Spice Invader: A spice invader will pillage and plunder the Spice universe at will. Their reckless sense of adventure often gets them in over their heads. A spice invader may for instance, insist on venturing too close to a habenero black hole from which there can be no return. You will find them in zero gravity restrooms blowing out o-rings.

4. The Overlords, Masters of Spice and Thyme: These creatures are not of this universe. They have Spice Madness and will stop at nothing to doiminate and conquer all things spicy. They have completely oblitereated their pallete. Curiously, they do not flock together, no they are far too competitive. If two Spice Overlords should occupy the same space a great Spice battle will ensue until there is noting but charred wrekage and a single true Overlord. You will notice them by the sweat streaming from seemingly endless pores, and yet they will insist that they are just fine.

Chicago...ing

So we're off in June to see Steph's blanket in Chicago. Airfare is fucking retarded right now. It was really difficult finding a good price that fits in with our plans, but we managed. Seriously though who comes back on a Saturday afternoon? I guess peeps that want to save like $200. Namely us. Now we just have to figure out where to stay in Chicago. Steph has a client who can possibly get us a good deal. We'll see. Steph and I were saying that if the good deal is even something like $600 off an $800 room, well that's still not a good deal for us. We'll figure it.

Also, I hate to think it but my new Chef partner is mildly flakey. We're supposed to meet up later but we'll see.

Oy Vey!

On saturday I spent the better part of my early afternoon getting some work done on my arm, thanks holly. It's a funny thing to hear "wow on your skin taht color just looks awesome!" and then it's funny to show Steph and she says "Man, that color your skin looks good, it's not fair!"

Anyway, I digress, as I had to fit my newly tattooed arm into a dress shirt because we went to her Boss' kids Bar Mitzfah. I alos wore a sweater, which lately was a really crazy idea since it's been blazing hot, but I needed to cover up the big blue bandage showing through my white shirt. Anyway the weather cooperated with my sweater. It was fine. Also, I have never been to a Bar Mitzfah before, and I'm told this was not your typical affair. It was quite lavish indeed. There was a giant tent, with a sunken dance floor and a stage, concert lighting and sound, a fully stocked bar with top shelf liquor as well as nice margaritas and delicious chateau neauf de pape(sp, because I'm too lazy to google it right now). The food was tasty, consisting of different buffet stations with things like sushi, lamb chops, ribs, pizza and pasta. Keep in mind this is essentially a kids function, but they made it fit for fancy palates. The best part was the boy band with cheerleaders for back up dancers. One of the male back up dancers weaved his way through the masses and attemptd to hand me a glow stick, which I declined, and his response was to pop and lock away from me. WOW!!!!! Also we heard a rumor that the bar mitzfah boy gets a BJ. What? I feel like I want a Bar Mitzfah. Sheesh!

Chicago, we go!!!!!!!

I'm Thinking BiBi will fit into a duffel bag and further still into an overhead compartment. 4 Hours worth of Bull's penis plus her stinky rock collection should keep her quiet. Sticking it to the airlines yo!

Burmese Eats

Ok, as a first experiment for Spice Odyssey we went to Burma Superstar on Clement last night. That place is always hoppin' and I wanted to see why. I've never had Burmese before, but I knew it was a blend of regional flavors, but it's adtually quite distinctive really. You can mos def tell there are obvious nods to Thai, Indian and Chinese cuisine but they really do it well. Let me just say, Tea Leaf salad is de-lish! Anyway, Steph was able to eat everything and enjoy it as it did not burn her mouth from a spice perspective.

Tonight we do Sushi Sams with Steph's pops. Not a bad way to start the weekend. Toro here I come yo!!!!

Stuff

John and I basicly laid out the radio show last night, so I'm happy to be getting that taken care of.

I hope "she" is feeling ok. I know "she" has some stuff floating around inside of her head and it's making her feel a litle bit yuck-ish of late.

Bee is getting longer, and longer. She's the best.

Must get the Spiceodyssey.org blog up and running. THe spice must flow. Maybs this is an excuse to go to Burma Superstar to rate the spice factor.

Mutter's Day

I purchased this for my Moms:

Old

I need to update my musical repitoire. Also I just got Reason 4 up and running and I am retarded for the Thor synth. Anyway send me new music asap!

Scooter Issues

Ok, a very retarded episode in my saga to legally ride my sccoter happened last week. I failed the stupid road test portion at the DMV. In California, Scooter riders have to get a motorcycle lisc. added in order to ride. Anyway, also to add a little twist to the ordeal, my lisc. expired and because I have permit for the Scooter they the DMV will only give a temporary extension. I digress. I went the DMV to take the test, my lisc. extension has now expired and my bike is dying on me. I ask the DMV peep to take care of my externsion so I could take my test. Instead she charges me $73 to renew the registration, which I never asked her to do. I assumed the fees were to renew my lisc. Yeah, not so much. Anyway, I took the test and failed. Peeps were right it is difficult to pass. Even more so because my scooter has some transmission issues that cause it to be at either a dead stop or at full speed, well full RPMs anyway. Also, the DMV charges you $6 if you fail a test for some reason. Most importantly, i needed my lisc. to be renewed and I can't be going back to the DMV every two months to get the temporary extension. I told the guy just to give me the full extension. He informed me that it would end my motorcycel permit and I'd have to start all over again. UGH!!! Fuck it, I got my lisc. renewed. As for the scooter Basicly I can try the test again for free, which I will fail without investing some work into my engine, or I can spen like $250 to take the safety course which counts as the road test................. I dunno, the scooter is in the garage right now. I'll figure all that out later. Maybs I'll sell it?

Anyway, I realize that this posting is quite a word jumble. Sorry, I'm trying to do the 9 to 5 thing. Anyway, go to CD baby and buy a CD from me.