Monday, January 4, 2010

Stereotype me please.

I love it when cliche becomes truth. It's usually quite amusing when a situation or a person says or does something that evokes what would normally be fodder for an episode of Sienfeld or Arrested Development. On Saturday Steph and I dined with a small group of peeps at Greens in Ft. Mason. If you're not familiar with Greens, it's San Francisco's fancy "vegetarian" restaurant. It even has the Price Fixe menu to prove it. It's a restaurant that's always booked and has a great view of the Golden Gate Bridge as well. You can also bring all of your vegetarian friends out and make them feel pampered, if for a night. We ended up in a semi-private room which to me is always awkward because the overall lack of white noise just seems to make things a little too quiet at times. This also gives rise to my question as to why loud music is not pumped into public restrooms? I digress. The best part of the night wasn't the food rather it was the waiter. He was brilliant! It was like I was watching a dude skillfully working his best Groundlings performance. A tour de force if you will. Mind you this is all in the context and framework of working in a very high end (pretentious perhaps?) "VEGETARIAN" restaurant.

He starts off by informing us that he will in fact "Be caring for us this evening." which is a super granola way to say "I'll be your server tonight." Well played, we're totally engaged now. At one point he over heard loud talk form the table about being an Oakland resident. He immediately jumped at the opportunity to enlighten the table with his knowledge of all the wine bars et al that are popping up all over Piedmont St. Ah, namedropping. Wonderful! Of note Steph and I live in San Francisco and we rarely if ever cross the bridge so any goings on in Oakland are completely over our heads. He seemed very disappointed to find out that two fifths of his table had no idea what he was talking about. When talking in depth about one of the newest businesses opening on the block it allowed him to segue quickly into his metal working studio and how he had been commissioned to do the "metalwork." Wonderful! Did I mention that one of our party is Vegan? No? Well he found out and quickly let her know that he in fact has been Vegan for nearly ten years and would happily "guide" her through the menu. Lucky Girl. And I think my favorite quote of the night that almost caused me to rise from my chair in applause was his response to a mention of the uber haughty Raw restaurant called Millennium. "OH, yes that's Eric So and So a very good friend of mine. We've foraged for mushrooms together!" Seriously, that's genius! In my best creative moments I would have never thought of that line.

As to the food, it was okay I suppose, not $50 for four courses great, except the Butterscotch Pot de Creme which was delicious. But it wasn't the food it was the impromptu entertainment that made it all worth it.

Also included with this post are two pictures that have absolutely no relevance to the post in any way as they are snaps from Xmas featuring yours truly and Steph and our dog Bibi. The only thing I can say that could possibly make any sense in including it is that all of us are in fact NOT vegetarians. Isn't that interesting?



7 comments:

Some Chilean Woman said...

Not a vegetarian either, but I still enjoy the restaurant reviews especially since my hubby and I are going to San Francisco in May...hopefully.

mel said...

veggie here. that place sounds pretty good. btw good jobs on the pretzels you made, those looked yummy.

recipe?

Nerd Love-Bot said...

SF is fun lot's to eat!

Mel - Danke about the Pretzels. They were fun to make. Also, if you're a veggie, you might really like Greens. They really do a good job of going the extra mile for you guys.

the cat whisperer said...

Did he sit with you? That's my favorite, when they just slide right in next to you or pull up a chair at the table and start talking to you like it's T.G.I.Friday's or something. Classayyy.

Do you and your fancy lady have the same glasses?

Nerd Love-Bot said...

Oh I hate when waiters do that! I think he was about one step away from that honestly. It is entirely possible that could have been good for some extra low comedy that night. Note to wait staff: We are not buddies!

Anyway, are frames are similar (Black) and we switched for this photo and were pretty surprised that we ended up looking pretty much the same.

the cat whisperer said...

I thought so! I was going to word it differently when I first typed it, as "are you wearing your girlfriend's glasses?" but I was afraid that you weren't, and I didn't want you to think I was implying you were a woman, haha.

Nerd Love-Bot said...

Haha! No worries I'm pretty self effacing anyways so that would have made me laugh. Although some girl told Steph she thought my glasses looked too big for me and I hate that girl now, so go figure.