Monday, September 28, 2009

Bad Thai Food

I knew i shouldn't have let myself get so fixated on this place. I just knew it. I saw this place whilst driving down Post st. and for some reason the purple neon lights beckoned to me. We tried to go on Saturday night but couldn't find parking. So I insisted we try it last night. What was I thinking? I hadn't read any reviews of the place prior to going. I hadn't even heard any word of mouth about it either. I just knew I had to do it. I think it's because after eating at the Thai noodle shop in L.A. I have become obsessed with finding similar noodle gems here in the city. I seriously love southeast Asian food. Thai, Cambodian, Vietnamese, Burmese et al. I haven't eaten Laotian food, but I hear it's very similar. Sadly, with the huge popularity of these cuisines there seems to be such a cluster fuck of mediocre to bad restaurants out there. Bahn on Polk st. was no exception. I should have known when Steph pointed out the fact that no one was there when we came in. Bad sign. I should have known when we sat down and watch a roach scurry down the wall. But, I can be one stubborn bastard when I want to be. I learn things the hard way at times. I ordered a plate of unspectacular fried noodles with pork. Snooze. What really drove it home was the pink in color soup that Steph got. It looked to me like when beets are introduced into a salad that has blue cheese dressing, or some other iteration of white cream based dressing, involved. It turns this sickly pink color. What a horrible color for broth to be. The flavor didn't do much to help. I couldn't nail it down but it didn't taste remotely Thai to me. And lastly, the inclusion of faux crab in the soup was just horrific. I deplore imitation crab. Not because of it's taste, which is almost non existent but rather I hate it because it's fake and the restaurant is telling you they are too cheap to use the real thing. It was a sad dinner. Oh and they only take cash which I hate because I hate carrying cash. Steph said she might have thought the servers shoes were okay, for vacation shoes anyway. They were these little shoes that had all the look of a mary jane and all the comfort of a sneaker. I was in no mood. They looked awful to me. They're her feet, but I would have to lodge a protest against them. Seething with rage we went to the grocery store to have a little shop. I said little shop because I'm really enjoying the way Brits say things like "having a laugh" or "having a sleep." I have also heard one of them say that he and his girl were going to do a "big shop" rather than a small one. Brilliant! And no I don't wish I was English and therefore go around annoying people with my faux Brit accent or my insistence that I love soccer. I may annoy Steph at times with my insistence that I love British comedy. Just ask her about when we were fist dating and I put Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy in the VCR. But whatevs. I really do. Also I like that they eat a lot of things involving meat pies and mashed potatoes and lots of sauce to cover everything. That's pretty exciting too. To sum up. Bahn no good. Also don't pretend that you're English. It works for Jude Law and that's great but he also got caught fucking his not at all hot housekeepr.


mahuahua said...

"I have also heard one of them say that he and his girl were going to do a "big shop" rather than a small one."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.we do a big shop!!!usually at tesco,or asda.though if it's just a little shop we usually just pop to sainsbury's for a few bits and pieces.

the use of "big light" is also a favourite of mine.a big light would be like the light on the ceiling as opposed to a lamp."shall i put the big light on?"

oh the fun you will have if you ever come over to the UK!i have a lot of fun being english in wales.phrases like, "is it" at the end of everything (like "so you're going shopping is it?"), a really weird double question. and then there's the totally nonsensical "i'll be there now" (actually meaning "i will be there soon" but using "now",which in turn makes no sense whatsoever.)

oh,what larks!:D

Nerd Love-Bot said...

Hahaha! I love it. I have been to the UK once, London actually, but that was too long ago. I must get back. Also, I remember hearing that you can spot a Welsh person because they end their sentences going upwards in tone and English peeps end theirs going down in tone. I have no idea if that's true, but I probably wouldn't be able to tell anyway. I work with a couple of your peeps and the "is it" phrase is totally them! Also, one of them is newer on the job and I don't really know him but I saw him watching cricket online and I was being totally sarcastic and said "How many wickets does that guy have?" Um, apparently my sense of humor went right over his head because I got a blank stare and he informed me "that's not quite the right terminology." Uh, ok. Fail.

mahuahua said...

haha,what a miserable bastard!i hate people like that!we have a woman at work who is like that,just does not get sarcasm in the slightest.somebody said something pretty darn funny to her the other day,and there was just...nothing.a blank look and silence.pure silence.

Nerd Love-Bot said...

Some peeps just don't get "it." In fact most people don't. I have resigned myself to that.

mel said...

lol, have you seen Eddie Izzards bit on supermarkets?
i'm to lazy to find you a link, but just search it on youtube, it funny. he calls shopping carts trolleys.

Nerd Love-Bot said...

Hah, yeah he's funny. And they totally call them trolleys. Pretty awesome.